Today I paid my dues for this job. Besides long due unreimbursed taxi claims, I had to pay for this ‘destroyed’ article of clothing. It was my over sight. Though it did cost a pretty penny considering I am not paid. No matter how careful you are, it does seem that when things that will go wrong will go wrong. It is a different environment and I am just trapping water. Somehow, I do not know whether this will pay off. Perhaps being lazy is easier? I have to keep reminding my self that dreams do not always come true. Fairy tales only exist in story books and they belong there. The same with all romantic whimsies.

On the train home from yoga, I saw a girl and her boyfriend look at the latest issue of the Magazine. I felt really proud, like a sense of accomplishment even though I did not contribute much to the February issue. I am silly like that, little things make me happy.

News about Haiti is very heartbreaking. BBC covers the situation all the time and I watched the looting on teevee. I always need reminding that my life does not suck half as bad as these poor people and I count my blessings. I wonder what I would do in that situation. Looting is for survival. Maybe dream chasing is irrelevant when people are already poor and dealing with earthquake consequences.

When you say I am brave, are you mocking me? Heh, not you Addy. I will not be mad, I understand from your point of view. My point of view… does it matter? When they knock you down like that song, I bounce back again. Always. But if I just lie there and not get up again, what does that say about me?