Erich Segal, the author and screenwrite of Love Story has passed away. Now who is Erich Segal? What is Love Story? Love Story is the ultimate tear jerker starring Ali McGraw in all her black straight hair finery and Ryan O’Neal. I never watched the movie. (Duh.) But I know of Ali McGraw with her hippie chic and Ryan O’Neal when he was young and hot. (You may know Mr O’Neal as Faye Dunaway’s long time companion, Faye Dunaway being the queen of Angel Wings hair and original Charlie’s Angel).

My point actually is the movie spawned an ultra disgusting line to date (no offence to Mr Segal): Love means never having to say you’re sorry. (Cue hurling)

I do not have patience for love stories. Tortured unhappy endings maybe.

For the nth time, I do not want to get married in a church. I do very much hate myself. I am gross. No dress could salvage the situation. Not even a 13 K Birkin.