Everytime I need to distract myself, I start to watch teevee and read fan fiction. Yes it’s very sick. Enveloping myself in a world that doesn’t exist. When all I need is actually sleep. But I escape into that world in which I believe that everything happens the way my mind wants it to. Pretty actors and actresses just come into play where they are my puppets.

The Laney asks why I don’t write my own fan fiction. No one to judge me, no one to tell me where I went wrong, no googling to find out how makeup causes rough skin. I could think of the most complicated plots in which the atypical happens, the things I want to happen in real life can unfold if I am just willing to type furiously.

On another note, it has finally ended. For those in the know, I believe that this is the very last time that I will mention him here and hopefully in my life. All along, I believed that karma exists and payback is sweet. But this had proved to be untrue. As the memories attempt to get washed out from my head, I know something. I will never forget the lessons that I learnt and the lies that I was fed. I lived with a facade for so many years to this day, I don’t know what was the truth. I will never find out. I will live with the hatred though it is just a waste of energy but this is my cross to bear. I was a fool. A fool to ever wonder about him.