Cups took picture with Godfrey Gao. Plus pictures of Mark Zhao and Godfrey Gao.

Cuppy I am super duper freaking godamn jealous lah!

Of all places to see her again, we bumped into each other in Butter’s toilet. I was at the sinks just waiting for Xin bebe and suddenly I felt eyes on me. The queue waiting to use to toilet was long and snaked along the wall. I was wearing socks with my new wedges so I thought it was the usual disapproval from other females about my choice of footwear and hosiery. For some reason, she looked familiar, then I realised who she was exactly.

She smiled. For a minute, I wonder what to do. But I decided to be a bigger person, after all, it has been 9 years and I am more mature. Or should be more mature because I am still older than her. So I walked towards her

She said she met up with Mas occasionally. I knew that but just nodded along. She said she heard that I was doing well. I explained that I just changed my job. But she said she meant my temper. I had to bite my tongue. I lost my temper all the time back then only because of her. But I just smiled. She said that she heard from Mas that someone was courting me, plenty of boys. I just looked at her and wondered why things were this way, she said I could get my contact from Mas for anything, I didn’t bother to get her number. Luckily my phone was with Xin bebe. I tried to make small talk about how hot it was inside Butter. When it finally got to the point when I had to go, I just grabbed her shoulder. I couldn’t bring myself to hug her.

I can’t remember what we used to talk about. I can’t remember how it was like, when we were on good terms and when things soured. But I know that after nine years, the hurt is still there.

I just can’t get it down to yoga. Nor lacing up my shoes that incidentally are at Fats’ house.

Sweets for my sweet! Wish I was in Sydney with the one and only darling Dominikki for her engagement party.

I need to know why girls find emotional, brooding, dark guys so attractive?

I am drowning here. The dam opened and the floodwaters poured out last Friday. What is wrong with me? I will survive. Even if it means going to work early and leaving late. Even if it means working at home after my shower instead of indulging in ridiculous time wasters. Even if it means feeling stupid because I took more than an hour to do something that my predecessor did in ten minutes. I cannot give up, not after I have come such a long way. The way ahead is a long and rough one but so is the way back to where I started from.

Indian tennis player marries a Pakistan cricket player. This is called a peace treaty.

When work requires you to hit the beach on a weekend, the line between work and play blurs. It seems rather surreal when you watch people you have interviewed on TeeVee. They seemed like ordinary Human Beings then. I guess I am still ’starstruck’.

Butter was on Friday night for BB’s birthday, though the birthday girl was missing at Zouk for half of the night. As it is, I always come up with conclusion that I am really getting too old to club. But Xiu Ru on the other hand, always comes up tops and leaves bubbling and insisting that the night was fun. Well, I guess leaving the club when the lights switch on does signal a successful night. The fun part of the night was revealing our actual ages to little boys. It was a hell of a laugh.

One and a half Flamings plus others and we are still standing.

Third day of my new job. Little things I have learn is that no double spacing after Full Stops. How to get used to not double spacing after Full Stops, single spacing was only used after commas? But like the other tough stuff that I have to get used to, I have to get used to little new things like this. Blogging now is abit tough now that I have to literally pull articles out of my ass. Dear Pam was correct, there is only so many words you can use to describe lipstick.

*Sidetrack: I have to start using makeup, I have no bloody idea how to write about how to use eyeshadow, etc. and of course, adjectives.

J Crew always has good outfit ideas. Laidback preppy chic (sounds familiar Jackie?) In my imaginary world, I look like that, lithe and floaty, without a care in the world, with the easy capability to carry off ribbed socks with sandals without looking like a deranged Japanese housewife wanna-be.

In an alternate universe, I look like this. The only reason why I want a Leica camera is to tote it around in the adorable little leather case, strapped across my body. I could wear layers without the fear of armpit stains. I would be captured by street photographers.

In this world, I can’t wear coloured tops with sleeves. My face is oily before noon. My thighs are not flattering. I am turning 28 this year and my tummy is not longer as flat as it used to be. I work almost twelve hour days, but without result. I ask silly questions and write even sillier crap that I have to redo time after time. I would lose patience with myself too. But somehow, I doggedly try. As long as I try my best, I will survive. Right?

Sometimes I wonder whether if I found the dress that was almost perfect and I wore it everyday, would it seem like I never bathe and wash my clothes?

How about like this girl in The Uniform Project?

From the website:

‘The Idea: Starting May 2009, I have pledged to wear one dress for one year as an exercise in sustainable fashion. Here’s how it works: There are 7 identical dresses, one for each day of the week. Every day I will reinvent the dress with layers, accessories and all kinds of accouterments, the majority of which will be vintage, hand-made, or hand-me-down goodies. Think of it as wearing a daily uniform with enough creative license to make it look like I just crawled out of the Marquis de Sade’s boudoir.’

Gem of Life ended. The entire series is 82 episodes and you would think that after building it up for eighty freaking hours the ending would Rock Your World. (I stopped watching properly after Miss Linda Chung arrived on the corner, even darling Bosco could not keep my concentration). The ending did not even rock the small pebble at the edge of the river where the waves crash in. Random scene of the Kang family sisters arriving home to hug their mother. I haven’t lost my auntie TVB obsession but kids, please do better!

Managed to lose my advance booking privileges for yoga this week. How about my good attendance all this time for 2 years? Yoga shouldn’t make me sad.

Awful Procrastination. I have to do work Now.

I want to do a story about emotional eating. I will write about myself.